Always around my birthday this awful feeling hits me, that I should have accomplished more by now. I look to my left and to my right, comparing my accomplishments to those of others and mercilessly talk down to myself. This year especially felt like a failure, like I hadn’t achieved enough and I just didn’t know how to get over feeling this way. I felt so discouraged and dissappointed with myself, I didn’t have any energy left to start over and cheer myself on. This is how I got back on track, after feeling unaccomplished, discouraged and defeated.
Check if your expectations of yourself are even realistic
The next step is to clearly envision what it is that you wanted to have achieved by now. Is it even realistic? Could you have done it by now or is it fantasy-you. This fantasy you easily achieves everything, compared to the real you – but most of the time, this is super unrealistic story we tell ourselves. Envision what you want. What needs to be done in order to achieve it. Stop comparing yourself with others, who might have already gotten there. It doesnt matter how old you are, when you get there, it only matters that you get there, in order to feel accomplished.
Understand that it is not too late, but time to make a change.
If you really really want something, saying “it’s too late now” is simply a lame excuse. It is never too late to achieve your dreams, when you are willing to put the work in. Success is not meant for lazy peeps and complainers, it’s about knowing that it takes hours of dedicated, disciplined work and doing it anyway – even if you don’t feel like it. Using your age as an excuse is only negative selftalk, and wont get you anywhere. How would you feel in 5 years from now, if you would not follow up this dream of yours right now?
Don’t wallow in self-pity, but use it as motivation to get better.
It is very easy to get caught up in this horrid thinking, that it’s “all too late now” and “I have failed my life” yada yada. One day it will actually be too late, one day you will be 84 wishing you had done all you could back when you were young, to make your dreams come true. All this negative sad energy that you feel – it’s normal and good to feel it – take it, and turn it into your motivation to get. shit. done! Once I realised this is energy I could use for and not against me, I really made progress.
Make an action plan, get a calendar, plan your week.
You can only get out of feeling unaccomplished by getting active and making progress. And there is no better way to make sure you get going, than making an action plan. Once you have envisioned what it is you want to accomplish, you can get yourself excited by setting your own goals and deadlines. Get a calendar to plan your week ahead! Meet small goals by the end of the week – any progress will feel amazing. Each morning I create a To Do List for the day, before I get up. It puts you in perspective of what needs to be done and sets your focus for the day.
Don’t lose sight of all you already achieved.
Your current life situation might not meet your standart of what you wish your life would look like right now, but then again, does it ever? I don’t think we are ever fully satisfied. With this thought in mind, take a moment to consider all these things you have done and achieved up until now. Take credit for all the hard work that went into getting the job you currently have, finishing school, getting your drivers licence and claiming your degree. All these things you managed to achieve by yourself – be proud!
Get active and stay active.
Any progress is getting you a step closer to your goal. After feeling down and discouraged, you realized that something needed to change and you now take the energy and devotion to turn your life into the life that you want. Stop the self-pity and get started today! Envision what it is that you want and create the plan how to get there. It is never too late if you are ready to work hard for it. Go ahead today and take action!
I’m here for you!
I know how tough it is, when you realize that you are nowhere near where you wanted to be by now. The only way you can feel better about your situation is to keep going. If it is still important to you in 5 years and you will regret not having followed it up in 10, you need to keep on working for it. It might take you longer than others, but all that counts is that you got there in the end. Don’t give up but keep on pushing and you will feel reenergized very soon.